Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
