I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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