I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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