I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
