It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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