Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
