PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
