butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
