Hey man sorry I got all grabby
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize