I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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