You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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