There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
