I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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