He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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