I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I lost the right to judge tonight
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
