doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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