Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Randomize
