pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
only you would photoshop your dick
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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