I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I want a musical about memes.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
