I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
