Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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