Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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