I wannas sexs uuuuu
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize