I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
