He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
