You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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