DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Randomize