I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
