You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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