Who wears a wallet chain?!
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize