I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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