Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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