happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
