I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
