Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize