I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
