marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
