I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Go christen that room with your naked body.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
