I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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