What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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