Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize