well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Is it because I queefed?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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