Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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