im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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