You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
