U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
My underwear smells like fireworks.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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