can we get nightvision for the apartment?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
