just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
