I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Bring me that man meat
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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