can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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