i just had sex bonerless
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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